


You came home too drunk last night so you crashed in my bed oh

by newlolly



Category: One Piece
Genre: Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Alternate Universe - Roommates/Housemates, Drabble, Drunk Sanji, Fluff, Happy Ending, I apologize for Drunk Sanji, M/M, Tumblr Prompt, curse words
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-13
Updated: 2019-02-13
Packaged: 2019-10-27 08:27:34
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,559
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17763296
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/newlolly/pseuds/newlolly
Summary: “You’re a virgin? How?”//"You came home too drunk last night to find your room so you crashed in my bed oh"Quick prompt exercise





	You came home too drunk last night so you crashed in my bed oh

“You’re a virgin? How?”

“You came home too drunk last night to find your room so you crashed in my bed oh”

X

From his bedroom, Zoro could hear the commotion of his roommate entering the house. It was the latter half of the night; the digital clock’s numbers approaching a bright green 2 AM. Zoro had been tossing and turning for hours now, wondering why his body was not allowing him to sleep.

The door swung open with a loud crash, the door knob pressing into the bright yellow wall in the entry way of the town house, leaving a mark. Sanji strolled in, staring at the dent in the wall from the door. He was slightly mesmerized by the mistake, something that would usually drive the man up the wall. “Fuuuuuck,” he scoffed with a slight giggle, holding the door open as the cold air blew through their shared home.

“I… fix that later,” Sanji called, to no one in particular, a giggle leaving his mouth again. He plopped himself on to the floor, where he stared at his dress shoes. The shoes seemed tighter than they usually did, and the man longed for comfort. Unfortunately, his brain could not process what needed to be done, and his hand began fishing in his pocket for a cigarette.

He lit the cigarette and exhaled the smoke. After a few more huffs, he felt his brain start to calm down. “Fuuuuck,” the blonde groaned again.

In his own room, Zoro reminded himself to take a few breaths and calm down. The last time Sanji had come home drunk, he had ended up entangled on top of Zoro on the couch, where the two fell asleep. Sanji had also freaked out the next morning when the two woke up cuddled together, and Zoro vowed no mistake like that would ever happen again. And then it did, twice. The first time, Sanji hadn't acknowledge Zoro for almost a week! And the second, he went about his day as if it had never happened.

Sometimes, the lack of acknowledgment hurt Zoro, and he just did not want to deal with the pain. The breeze carried the stench of cigarette through the house, where it landed at Zoro’s nose.

The man sitting on the floor was a sight to behold. Unlike his usual, perfectly manicured self, he had come home sloppy. The front of his hair was greasy, stuck to his forehead from sweating on the dance floor. The back of his hair stuck in every direction, partially from the intense make out session he had with a man he met on the dance floor. Sanji could still feel the man’s disgusting tongue in the back of his throat. His usually ironed dress shirt was buttoned crookedly, in his quick attempt to throw the garment back on.

“RO… rororo…” Sanji’s voice slurred, as he pulled his shoes off. He chucked one half way through the living room, where it landed on the end table with a clatter. The other shoe he dropped beside himself. “RO ro or.”

Zoro knew what was coming, and he held his breath. Sanji would hopefully see the empty bed in his bedroom, and crash. Most drunk people came home too blacked out to do anything else right? Moments went by; Zoro wished that Sanji had passed out on the living room floor and would later find himself to bed.

Heavy footsteps continued down the hall, and Zoro’s bedroom door creaked. Sanji’s head popped in, as he opened the door, which slammed against the wall again.

“What do you want Cook?”

“I can’t find my bedroom.”

Zoro didn’t budge from his bed, where he watched Sanji’s movements. “Down the hall.”

“Noooo,” Sanji slurred. “The bed’s right here.”

Sanji reached for the button on his pants, as he slid the black jeans off his slender hips. Zoro’s eyes bulged at the display in front of him.

“It’s down the hall,” Zoro reaffirmed in the most adult voice he could.

“I’m drunk,” Sanji said. “And I’m soooo sorry.”

“Cook. Go to bed.”

“I’m tryingggggg. But you won’t let me!” Sanji’s fingers reached for the buttons on his dress shirt, which he fumbled with for a few moments, before giving up and tearing the shirt of his head. He threw it to the floor with a flick of the wrist.

With just the moonlight shining in, Zoro took in what he could of Sanji’s figure without feeling guilty. Sanji’s skin was pale white, and he was thin, but muscular. Hickey’s lingered up and down his chest, large bruises. Zoro questioned briefly how big the woman had to be that left those.

“You need to go to bed Sanji.”

“I’m tryinggggg fuuuck, just let me go to sleep,” Sanji whined, stepping more and more towards the bed.  The realization had hit Zoro that he was responsible to play babysitter with his roommate now. He sat up just as Sanji sat down on the other end of the bed.

“Let me take you down the hall.”

“He wanted to have sex with me tonight, and guess what? I was a good virgin. I kept my proooomise,” Sanji slurred, leaning closer to Zoro. He accentuated his O’s, and his breath still reeked of the alcohol.

Zoro grunted back, pretending to be uninterested in whatever Sanji was drunkenly babbling about. But overall, he was bewildered. A virgin? Sanji? A virgin? And what promise?

“Robin made me promise!”

Zoro grunted, not allowing whatever Sanji’s drunk self was doing to bother him.

“I didn’t do it Zoro. I didn’t have seeeeexxxxxx,” he whispered right into Zoro’s face.

“I’m going to sleep, shitcook.”

“Me too!”

“In your own bed,” Zoro groaned, as Sanji stretched out across his.

His breathing started to hinder, and Zoro laid down. He found that Sanji’s body was radiating a warmth off it, and he drew in. The men were soon cradled next to each other.

“Sanji,” Zoro nudged him slowly. “You should move to your own room.”

“But I want to sleep with youuuu,” he whined. “Just tell me you don’t like me, and I’ll leave.”

Zoro grew quiet, unsure of how to respond, and soon, Sanji was snoring as the alcohol raged through his body. Zoro draped his blanket over them both, and he found his arms wrapped around Sanji’s waist.

X

“What the fuck.”

Zoro’s eyes crept open at the sound of shouting next to him. He allowed himself to take in the light coming through the window as he remembered that Sanji had fallen asleep next to him.

The man was upright, his eyes closed, holding his head in his hands. “Why am I naked, why am I HERE, and why does my head hurt?”

“You came home drunk, you tell me,” Zoro said, unconcerned. He propped himself up against the pillow as Sanji rocked back and forth next to him. He reached his arm around his roommate, and hesitated, afraid of breaking the boundaries. After a few moments, he began rubbing his hand into the small of Sanji’s back.

“Why am I in your room?”

“You came home last night too drunk to find your own room.”

“What else did my stupid self do?” Sanji groaned, rubbing his head back and forth. “You stupid moss head staying in bed and taking advantage of me!”

Knowing that his shit cook of a roommate was taking out the frustration of his headache, Zoro smirked a remark back. “Don’t worry you are still a virgin.”

“I need a cigarette,” Sanji mumbled as he flopped back into the bed. His face has turned a mixture of pale white and bright red at Zoro’s comment, until his eyes found his own chest.

“What are these?”

Zoro grumbled. “Came home with them. Presumably from the chic at the bar.”

“My head hurts,” Sanji groaned, “and it wasn’t a chic.”

The two sat in quiet company for a little while, Sanji eventually laying down and covering his head with a pillow. Zoro retrieved a glass of water, sat it next to the bed, and laid back down too. He waited briefly before putting his arm around Sanji, who didn’t argue the hand away. It was comfortable, and Zoro wondered whether this would continue.

“Can I ask a question,” he murmured into the crook of Sanji’s next, huddling up close. “How are you a virgin?”

“I’m just… holding out for someone special.”

“Oh.”

“When I’m not hungover,” Sanji spoke slow, eyes closed. “I’m irresistible.”

“I don’t get the luxury of seeing you,” Zoro whispered, leaving himself wrapped around the thin body of his roommate. He questioned the term of endearment – roommate – since the affection displayed had happened on multiple occasions.

“Yeah.” Sanji swallowed. His heart fluttered inside his chest. “Hey Zoro?”

“Yeah?”

“My drunk self ended up here because you are the someone special.”

Zoro leaned in, smelling the combination of booze and tobacco on his roommate. He wrapped his arms tight around Sanji’s midsection, resuming the spooning position. A smile grew across the brute’s face as his hands no longer felt foreign on Sanji.

“Please don’t do this again,” he said, running his hands over the trail of hickeys.

Sanji shifted, the hangover from his headache prevalent. A smile crossed over his face as he relaxed into Zoro’s arms to sleep away the alcohol in his blood.

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you for reading! I wrote this at like 11 PM on a night when I decided not to do any of my homework because it was not necessary to work on tonight, and I did a quick pinterest search for OTP Tumblr Prompts! There are so many good prompts that would just work so well for Sanji and Zoro and I just can not get enough of the cuteness running through my body!  
> I really apologize for the bad pacing in this story, I had a lot of ideas flowing and I just wanted to have something small to post. This was inspired by my screenwriting teacher, who told me today that I have a natural talent for writing, and we've learned so much about story structure in that class alone I wanted to try something out. Let me know what you think!


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